Guys are always asking me what they should say to attract women. The truth is, often it’s not so important what you say, it’s how you say it that’s important.

One of the easiest ways you can make yourself appear more attractive to women is by improving your body language. A study at UCLA showed that 93 per cent of communication is from “non-verbal” cues. Here’s some tips that you can use right away to improve your own non-verbal communication.

Start from the center

When we feel threatened, embarrassed or nervous, we tend to cover up one or more of:

• Our face, nose & mouth
• Our neck (by lowering out head)
• Our chest (by folding our arms)
• Our groin (by crossing our legs)

If you think about it, you’ll notice that all of these run in a straight line down the centre of your body. To fix this and appear more confident, think about keeping the center of your body open. Your head should be upright, your back straight, legs comfortably apart and your hands by your sides.

Hold your drink by your side

As in the first tip above,we tend to cover our chests when we feel nervous or threatened. Head to any bar or club on a Saturday night and you’ll see hoards of men standing around with their drinks across their chests like a kind of protective shield. If you want to appear more confident, hold yours low and by your side.

Smile

Confident guys who are successful with women tend to smile a lot, so if you want to have the appearance of being one of these guys you should do the same. Smiling’s contagious, so if you’re smiling, it’s likely she will be too.

Use eye contact, but don’t stare

Maintain eye contact with her as you talk and if she’s in a group, move your eyes from one person’s to the next. If you’re not used to doing this, choose one eye and focus on it as you and her are talking. Be careful not to stare though, that can be creepy!

Don’t lean in

Next time you’re out at a bar or club, watch some of the guys that are trying to pick up girls. Most men tend to lean in towards the girl they have their eye on far more than they actually need to. Although I do recommend not being afraid to be a little physical early on, there’s no need to lean towards her unnecessarily.

Remember the quote from the Tao of Steve “We pursue that which retreats from us”. Leaning in communicates that you are chasing her. Not doing it subtly suggests that you are “retreating”.

Keep those hands still!

Another sign that you are lacking confidence is excessively fidgeting and gesturing with your hands. When we’re nervous, we tend to move around a lot more than we normally would, as we’re afraid of losing the other person’s attention. So, if you don’t gesticulate wildly and keep your hands relatively still, it will help to communicate confidence.

A little trick – hook your thumbs in your back pockets. This has the extra benefit of making you lean back slightly, and you remember that leaning in too much is bad right?

Good, confident body language is far more important than the words you use when trying to attract women. Start using the tips above straight away and you should see a big difference in the way girls act around you.

Tags: attracting women, body language, confidence

Get Free Dating Tips by Email

Like this article? You can get my free dating advice email every week - simply add your name and email address to the box below.



(Don't worry, I hate spam too and won't share your email address with anybody)

| Comments (0) | June 29th, 2009